Sunday, September 30, 2007

The next great 34-day fast begins tonight!!! Stay tuned for the plan in just a few hours...

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8:00 pm EST - The next great 34-day fast has begun! This very moment marks the start of day ONE of the great fast - day one of a one-day fast, meaning nothing but liquids from 8 pm tonight until 8 am Tuesday morning.

While I'll be administrating the group on facebook (if you're a facebook memeber and would like to join, msg me by searching for "Ana Regzig"), I'll be posting all my personal feelings and griefs and joys and successes and struggles and failures HERE. I tend to be pretty prolific, so I'd rather not clog up the group with anything that's not concise.

Wish me luck!

Monday, September 24, 2007

These tips are reminders as much to myself as to anyone. Gearing up for the next great 34-day fast!

Distraction from hunger/eating:

  • #1 - ALWAYS have a bottle of water, tea, diet coke, SOMETHING to drink in your hand. You'll be amazed how often you take sips off it without even thinking, keeping you full and distracted.
  • Clean something that's filthy, like the toilet or the cat's litter box. Take the garbage out and then scrub the inside of the can before you replace the liner. The smell alone will gross you out so much you'll NEVER want to eat again.
  • Make a rule of keeping the kitchen absolutely SPOTLESS at all times! Absolutely no dirty dishes in the sink or dishwasher, or drying on the side. Keep the towels folded neatly, the spices all lined up and facing label-side out, alphabetize them or put them in height order. Scrub the floor again. If you make a rule of keeping it immaculate at all times, you won't be so tempted to fix something to eat thus creating more mess to clean.
  • Purge your stores. Take at least 10 items from your closet, 2 pairs of shoes, and 5 pieces of jewelry and donate them to a local Goodwill or Salvation Army. Then treat yourself to a new outfit - dress, shoes, jewelry, and a hat, belt, or handbag! You'll feel better for helping a good cause - and burn calories without eating at the same time.
  • Give yourself a manicure. Even if it's only been three days since your last one. If your nails are wet, they can't be digging inside a bag of chips!
  • Brush your teeth - again. You'll be less tempted to get your teeth and mouth dirty again with food.
  • Keep your lipstick touched up 24 hours a day. Moisturizer, liner, color, and gloss. Not only will you be constantly beautiful, but you won't be tempted to mess them up by putting food in your mouth. Sip water with a straw.
  • Purge your kitchen. Start by drinking two full 8-oz glasses of ice cold water, so you'll feel full and cold and won't be tempted to eat. Then get a bag or a box and clean out your cabinets and your fridge of anything that isn't high-fiber, high-protein or low-cal. Donate it to a local homeless shelter or soup kitchen. On your way home, drink another liter of cold water and feel great about your good deeds!
  • Do spring cleaning in the fall! Start at the top of each room, clean the dust bunnies out of all the corners, off the ceiling fans, dust the tops of shelves, and work your way down until you're sweeping/mopping/vacuuming the floors. Burn calories, burn! Have a tall glass of ice-cold lemon water every hour as you go, to keep your stomach from growling.
  • DANCE! Why wait to get to the club? Dim the lights, or turn off the bulb-lights and light a slew of candles. Put on a disc of all your favorite dance tunes and pump up the volume! Even better - set up a full-length mirror and work on your dance moves. Which moves could look better if you were just five pounds thinner? Let these images be your own thinspiration.
  • Look at that journal of thinspo again. Then look in the mirror and remember how far you have to go. Skim through magazines or online articles and find at least 10 new pictures to add.
  • Set your alarm to go off every half-hour. Set your shoes by the front door. No matter what you're doing when the alarm goes off, drop it, put on your shoes, and walk around the block as fast as you can. When you get home, have an 8-oz glass of ice water and set the alarm for the next half-hour.
  • Get creative. Do you sew, knit, or crochet? Are you great at pottery or glass etching, origami, painting or sketching? Are you an excellent poetess? Get started NOW on creative, beautiful, and thoughtful gifts for Christmas. And picture how skinny you'll be by the time you give these gifts to your loved ones.
  • Feel like you're about to binge? Before you open the fridge, write a one-page journal entry about why you feel like eating, ask yourself if you're really hungry or just bored. Remind yourself of your goals and question if this binge is going to help you reach those goals. Don't like writing essays? Don't allow yourself to eat UNLESS you write that page!
  • Write out a precise schedule of everything you're going to do tomorrow to stay distracted. (ex: 10 am-walk the dog, 10:30-lift weights, 11-wash dishes by hand, 11:30-shower, Noon-redo hair and makeup, 12:30-manicure, etc...) Don't allow yourself anytime to rest or eat. Only cold water. Then STICK to it!

Sunday, September 23, 2007

It's been a busy couple of days, which is great because it's kept me distracted from hunger and kept me moving (ie. burning calories). I made it another 48 hours on nothing but liquids, but I had to see a friend from out of town tonight, and we went for sushi. I ordered two small rolls, and doggy-bagged half of it for home, then tossed it in a big garbage behind a restaurant before I got here. (Shame to waste, but "better wasted than waisted.")

There's been some interest on the facebook about possibly starting another group fast. This is perfect timing for me, since I just found out I have a major photo shoot in the first week of November. I want to lose as much weight as possible before then. (If you want to join us, log on to facebook.com and search "Ana Regzig", msg me and I'll add you as a friend.)

I also want to address a request I had from J:

Hi friend. I'm glad you like the blog, and I thank you for your loyalty. I certainly never did this to be "famous" or "popular." On the contrary, more often than not I feel like I'd rather disappear into thin air, which is probably what makes me do what I do with fasting and restricting. But blogging gives me a safe place to journal my thoughts and lock them out in cyberspace. Having a seperate private identity gives me freedom to be my true self away from the public persona I wear daily in the real-world. The blog is a permanent reminder of where I've been and what I'm feeling without having an actual physical notebook or files saved on my computer or something that can be found in my possession and get me in trouble.

If you've been reading for sometime, you know already that I'm in sort of a high-profile career, I'm in show business. I'm not uber-famous like Nicole Richie or anything, but it's enough that any blemish on my personal facade could be detrimental to my career. Some of my closest personal real-life friends know that I have struggled with an eating disorder in the past, but right now I am purporting to be "recovered," and every day I strive to appear "normal and healthy" in public knowing full well that I come home and write my REAL story here to you guys.

I did get brave once and put a few personal pictures on my facebook profile. That lasted all of about four days until the paranoia had my head so fucked up that I had to take them down or risk seriously being thrown into an asylum. It was chaos -- if anyone from the real-world ever figured out my secret, or anyone from my ana-world figured out who I really am... oh God, just the thought sets me shaking. I seriously don't think I could handle being "caught." I'd be destroyed.

Thus... I can't put up any personal pics, face or no face. Professionally and personally, it's just not a good idea. I know it seems hypocritical to post someone else's fat picture, but (my justification is) that was done in a moment of extreme anger and grief. If it bugs anyone too much, just tell me and I'll take it down. These posts are not un-edit-able.

Meantime, my third fast of the week begins right now, or rather began tonight at about 7 pm. I haven't been to the gym for two days and I feel like a fucking cow. Can't wait to get in another 10-mile run tomorrow -- this new regimen has got me excited.

As soon as I get an exact date for the big photo shoot, I'll post a countdown ticker. That'll be fun. For now, I know the third fast in one week is going to be the hardest one of all. But it's worth it to be thin again.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Just a quick note before I dash out the door to a busy day... as of today, this blog has been viewed 2000 times. Not bad for only 90 posts!

Friday, September 21, 2007

I'm so disgusted by some of the things I've read on my own blog from the past two months. How the hell could I even THINK of eating???

I've been fasting for two solid days now, going into my third today, and I feel flippin' fantastic! Coffee is great, but it works so much better to hype you up on an empty stomach! And fasting has this great way of clearing my mind, making me feel more alert, more aware of myself. It feels great to be EMPTY.

I am starting to get just a little bit jittery. I've had the fuel of broken friendships to spur me on the past couple of days. But today the anger is beginning to subside, leaving room for hunger. I love feeling empty, but my energy is beginning to wane.

I found these South Beach diet box lunches at the grocery store on sale. Less than 300 calories for some chicken, chips, and a jello dessert cup. If I can't stand it anymore, I might have one. But then that's it... fasting again for at least another 48 hours before I eat again.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Just would like to show the world a picture of the FAT WHORE my ex is now dating.

[This image has been removed.]


Now, I may have let myself go lately, and I consider myself to be overweight, but I can safely say I am nowhere NEAR the size of this whale! She's got a flat face, crispy 80s hair, chipmunk cheeks, and thunderthighs that make that zip-zip sound when she walks. When she sits down wearing hiphuggers, she has to do that awful move (which she tries so desperately to hide) where she has to adjust the waistband of her pants from under her spare tire to over. Ugh!

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

What a fucking fool I've been!

I worked. I gained weight. Work stopped coming. My "friends" have all lied to me. One of my own good friends got married and didn't even bother to fucking tell me!!! How the hell does that happen?? My ex is now blasting pictures of him and the fat whore he took up after cheating on me. Well, fuck them all. I'm going to be skinnier and more beautiful than ALL of them. We'll see who gets the last laugh.

August was a tough month for me. I worked non-fucking-stop. Work is great, it means the $$ rolls in. But it also means long days on the set, and acting "normal" around people. Which requires eating, at least to some small degree.

And people are ALWAYS critical. If they don't comment out loud that "You don't eat enough," then they sit back and stare as you stuff your face, and you know they're thinking, "She could stand to lose a few pounds."

Well after a month of that damn roller coaster, someone convinced me that "Being healthy is better than being skinny." And I fucking believed them. For the past three weeks, I've been eating "normally," and have managed not to gain any more weight than I did when I was working.

However, I HATE how much I weigh now!!! Sure, I'm not gaining, and people say I should be "grateful," but I'm not losing either, and I'm not a completely happy person unless that number on the scale goes DOWN every day!!!
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I last talked to my friend "N" in May. He's got a new girlfriend, and I think that's awesome. He's crazy about her like I've never seen him go crazy for anyone before, and I really am very happy for him. (No, we never dated, it's just one of those really cool no-frills guy/girl friendships.) So when he stopped hanging out and calling me so much, I was totally ok with giving him some space to get to know his new girl. I thought, "When the time is right, he'll introduce her to his inner circle of friends. I'll wait til then."

That was only 3 months ago.

Then last night I was tooling around facebook and found his "girlfriend's" photo albums. And I thought, "hmmmm.... that's a beautiful white dress, but it looks an awful lot like a wedding gown. I wonder who the guy is?" And as I scanned through the pictures, I found one with a beautifully inscripted date "August 28, 2007" and their first names together with one last name.

WHAT THE FUCK?!?


In a state of complete mental shock, I immediately called up my best friend, "M." The three of us used to be inseperable, so if he hadn't told me, I knew she was going to be shocked as hell. When I asked her, "Guess who got married and didn't tell us?" She says, "Oh, him? Yeah that was three weeks ago, you didn't know?"

What the fuck?!? No, I didn't know! And why the hell didn't YOU tell me when you found out???

No, I didn't yell at her. I'm too much in shock. I just got really silent, and she knew something was up. It's bad enough he didn't tell me, but I can understand. Maybe he got his girlfriend pregnant and they had to get married quick (southerners, ya know?). But to try to stifle the silence on the phone, "M" starts going on about, "Remember how he used to be SOOO in love with me? Can you imagine how mad I am that he didn't tell me?"

Um.... my best friend didn't tell me either, so YEAH, I think I have an idea how YOU might fucking feel. Nice of you to think about how I feel too.

I fucking hung up the phone.

I'm too enraged right now, but in another note later I'll have to tell you all about my ex, the fat whore with whom he cheated on me, and the new "happy couple" pictures they've put up. Ugh. I need to go vomit now.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

15 Foods To Help You Lose
WebMD Feature from "Good Housekeeping" Magazine; By Denise Foley


New research points to more than a dozen foods, from beans to beef, that can help you fight hunger, kick your candy addiction, boost your metabolism-and ultimately shed pounds. And some of these superfoods deliver health bonuses too.

1. Eggs. Skip the bagel this morning. Eggs, which are full of protein, will help you feel fuller longer-a lot longer. A multicenter study of 30 overweight or obese women found that those who ate two scrambled eggs (with two slices of toast and a reduced-calorie fruit spread) consumed less for the next 36 hours than women who had a bagel breakfast of equal calories. Other research has shown that protein may also prevent spikes in blood sugar, which can lead to food cravings.

2. Beans. You've probably never heard of cholecystokinin, but it's one of your best weight-loss pals. This digestive hormone is a natural appetite suppressant. So how do you get more cholecystokinin? One way, report researchers at the University of California at Davis, is by eating beans: A study of eight men found that their levels of the hormone (which may work by keeping food in your stomach longer) were twice as high after a meal containing beans than after a low-fiber meal containing rice and dry milk. There's also some evidence that beans keep blood sugar on an even keel, so you can stave off hunger longer. Heart-health bonus: High-fiber beans can lower your cholesterol.

3. Salad. Do you tend to stuff yourself at meals? Control that calorie intake by starting with a large salad (but hold the creamy dressing). In a study of 42 women at Penn State University, those who ate a big, low-cal salad consumed 12 percent less pasta afterward-even though they were offered as much as they wanted. The secret, say researchers, is the sheer volume of a salad, which makes you feel too full to pig out. Health bonus: A study published in the Journal of the American Dietetic Association found that people who ate one salad a day with dressing had higher levels of vitamins C and E, folic acid, lycopene, and carotenoids-all disease fighters-than those who didn't add salad to their daily menu.

4. Green tea. The slimming ingredient isn't caffeine. Antioxidants called catechins are what help speed metabolism and fat burning. In a recent Japanese study, 35 men who drank a bottle of oolong tea mixed with green tea catechins lost weight, boosted their metabolism, and had a significant drop in their body mass index. Health bonus: The participants also lowered their (bad) LDL cholesterol.

5. Pears. They're now recognized as having more fiber, thanks to a corrected calculation by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. At six grams (formerly four grams) per medium-size pear, they're great at filling you up. Apples come in second, with about three grams per medium-size fruit. Both contain pectin fiber, which decreases blood-sugar levels, helping you avoid between-meal snacking. This may explain why, in a Brazilian study that lasted 12 weeks, overweight women who ate three small pears or apples a day lost more weight than women on the same diet who ate three oat cookies daily instead of the fruit.

6. Soup. A cup of chicken soup is as appetite blunting as a piece of chicken: That was the finding of a Purdue University study with 18 women and 13 men. Why? Researchers speculate that even the simplest soup satisfies hunger because your brain perceives it as filling.

7. Lean beef. It's what's for dinner-or should be, if you're trying to shed pounds. The amino acid leucine, which is abundant in proteins like meat and fish as well as in dairy products, can help you pare down while maintaining calorie-burning muscle. That's what it did for 24 overweight middle-aged women in a study at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. Eating anywhere from nine to 10 ounces of beef a day on a roughly 1,700-calorie diet helped the women lose more weight, more fat, and less muscle mass than a control group consuming the same number of calories, but less protein. The beef eaters also had fewer hunger pangs.

8. Olive oil. Fight off middle-age pounds with extra virgin olive oil. A monounsaturated fat, it'll help you burn calories. In an Australian study, 12 postmenopausal women (ages 57 to 73) were given a breakfast cereal dressed either with a mixture of cream and skim milk or half an ounce of olive oil and skim milk. The women who ate the oil-laced muesli boosted their metabolism. Don't want to add olive oil to your oatmeal? That's OK-it works just as well in salad dressings, as a bread dip, or for sautéing.

9. Grapefruit. It's back! A 2006 study of 91 obese people conducted at the Nutrition and Metabolic Research Center at Scripps Clinic found that eating half a grapefruit before each meal or drinking a serving of the juice three times a day helped people drop more than three pounds over 12 weeks. The fruit's phytochemicals reduce insulin levels, a process that may force your body to convert calories into energy rather than flab.

10. Cinnamon. Sprinkle it on microwave oatmeal or whole-grain toast to help cure those mid-afternoon sugar slumps. Research from the U.S.
Department of Agriculture found that a little cinnamon can help control post-meal insulin spikes, which make you feel hungry. Health bonus: One USDA study showed that just a quarter teaspoon of cinnamon a day lowered the blood sugar, cholesterol, and triglyceride levels in people with type 2 diabetes.

11. Vinegar. It's a great filler-upper. In a Swedish study, researchers found that people who ate bread dipped in vinegar felt fuller than those who had their slices plain. The probable reason: Acetic acid in the vinegar may slow the passage of food from the stomach into the small intestine, so your tummy stays full longer. Vinegar can also short-circuit the swift blood-sugar rise that occurs after you eat refined carbs such as white bread, cookies, and crackers.

12. Tofu. It seems too light to be filling, but a study at Louisiana State University showed that tofu does the job. Researchers tested it against chicken as a pre-meal appetizer for 42 overweight women-and the participants who had tofu ate less food during the meal. The secret: Tofu is an appetite-quashing protein.

13. Nuts. Yes, they are fattening: A handful of peanuts is about 165 calories. But research shows that people who snack on nuts tend to be slimmer than those who don't. A study from Purdue University found that when a group of 15 normal-weight people added about 500 calories worth of peanuts to their regular diet, they consumed less at subsequent meals. The participants also revved up their resting metabolism by 11 percent, which means they burned more calories even when relaxing. Health bonus: Walnuts contain omega-3 fatty acids. And researchers at Loma Linda University recently found that eating 10 to 20 whole pecans daily can reduce heart disease risks.

14. High-fiber cereal. Studies show that you can curb your appetite by eating a bowl for breakfast. But how well does it really work? Researchers at the VA Medical Center and the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis tested the theory against the ultimate diet challenge: the buffet table. They gave 14 volunteers one of five cereals before sending them out to the smorgasbord. Those who'd had the highest-fiber cereal ate less than those who didn't have as much fiber in the morning. Try General Mills Fiber One (14 grams per serving) or Kellogg's All Bran With Extra Fiber (13 grams per serving).

15. Hot red pepper. Eating a bowl of spicy chili regularly can help you lose weight. In a Japanese study, 13 women who ate breakfast foods with red pepper (think southwestern omelet) ate less than they normally did at lunch. The magic ingredient may be capsaicin, which helps suppress appetite.

DISCLAIMER: I had to put in a "healthy" article in the hopes that Facebook will not kick me off their system. Grrrr.