I think the reason I’ve lasted so long on this crazy “plan” to get down to under 100 pounds is that I’ve kept an eagle-eye on my daily tallies, intakes, outputs, and how it affects my weight, and also how I feel each day. I don’t deny myself what I crave, I just save it for an accomplished goal, a special celebratory occasion. And most importantly, I am CONSTANTLY updating and readjusting the “plan” according to goals I have and haven’t met so far, using factors that have and haven’t worked for me.
It occurred to me today that: Of course the weight loss is getting harder at this point. Today, I weigh lighter than I have in almost a DECADE. The fat I’m trying to burn off now has been there for a VERY long time, and is going to be that much tougher to remove.
Today’s intake: 300 calories (1 ½ cups juice, 1 banana).
***Note: I know I wanted to do liquids only, but I’m proud that this is the same amount of calories, only it’s healthy stuff instead of junk calories.
Plan for tomorrow’s intake: 300 calories (1 berry boost smoothie, and 1 cup fat-free milk).
***Note: Again, attempting to go healthy and quit the damn coffee.
Plan for Tuesday’s intake: 300 calories (1 cup juice, 1 Venti Starbucks).
***Note: Ok, so quitting coffee is going to take some TIME.
Total intake for the 4-day fast: 1514 calories.
Calories burned at the gym in the first 2 days: 3041.
Theoretically, if I can try to burn between 1000-1500 calories at the gym each day for the next 2 days, my goal to be 122 by Wednesday might still be achievable.
~~Please, Lord, let me get to 122 by Wednesday. All this madness is driving me crazy – literally. Just let me get there as soon as possible, and then I’ll stop for a little while, I promise.~~
I am thinking that I need to stop and hold on to a certain weight for a little while. After all, 122 is exactly halfway between my starting weight of 146, and my ultimate goal weight of 98. That’s really something to celebrate. I need to stop and try to eat, at least a little bit, for a few days in a row, and attempt to maintain a steady weight, to give my metabolism a chance to stabilize and catch up before embarking on the harder half of the journey to the goal.
Once I reach 122, I will have my cheat day. Then I’ll have to adjust my eating/working out schedules on a day-by-day basis to attempt to maintain that weight, somewhere between 122 and 125, for about one week. I don’t want to give up liquid fasting completely though. It’s been good for my body and my mind. Maybe I’ll finally try that 5-6-7-8 plan I came up with last week. That allows me to liquid-fast for one day between each eating day. And the eating days will require me to eat all HEALTHY food, no junk calories.
But…. :::sigh::: all in good time. For now, for tonight, I feel a little more restored after having a shower and laying down for a few hours to watch a movie. I was thinking about going out to the bookstore for a late-night coffee, but I'm just feeling too relaxed now to want to go out anywhere.
For the rest of the night I’m just gonna kick my heels up and take it easy. Halfway through the 4-day fast. Through the easy part, the hardest part is yet to come.
I HAVE to be strong. When I think of the possibility of being 123 on Wednesday and prolonging the fast for one more day to reach 122 by Thursday, I want to scream. I love fasting, but it does grow a little weary. I want those damn donuts!! ;)
~~Lord, grant me wisdom to remember to call on Your strength, and not to rely on my own. Grant me patience and perseverance to withstand this test. Grant me courage to praise You at all times, in strong victories and weak moments. Be with me at every second, and please, PLEASE let me be 122 by Wednesday.~~